Writing Down the Stories
for something you can do on your own

Summarizing the idea: Write down your memories of your loved one using things around you, lists of questions, or even Internet sites to help you trigger the memories that may seem hidden.

There are many things you can use besides photographs to help trigger your memories. While they do add an extra dimension to your stories, you may not have access to photographs of your loved one, or there may just not be many available. If that is the case, there are other things you can do to help you remember.

• Pull out a blank piece of paper. Ask yourself a few simple questions about him, write down the answers, and you'll have a good start. As you write, you'll remember more stories about him (take notes!) that you can write about later.
  • When and how did you first meet?
  • What about him made you laugh?
  • If you could only tell his children or grandchildren one thing about him, what would it be?
  • What was his favorite thing to do?
• Visit the following sites on the Internet and read through some of the questions listed. Think of how your loved one would answer, then write about your memories of him and how those topics affected his life.
  • Biography Assistant - a Genealogy.com guide to recording memories - the only site I've found with questions tailored to writing about a deceased loved one. Contact me if you know of any others.
  • Guide for Interviewing Family Members
  • Journal Jar Ideas - skip past the part about making a journal jar and go down to the questions.
• Read these Life Story Briefs from the Story Circle Network:
• Writing About Real People
• Writing About Disaster
• Go through a few of his things if you have easy access to them - school or office papers, aftershave or cologne, collectibles, etc.; think of things that represent the five senses. Think about how these "things" affected his life - how he felt about his job or school, what kinds of things he collected, and what they meant about him. Then write about the memories they bring to mind.
• Write letters to your loved one about things you would talk to him about if he were here. This becomes a sort of journal for you, but it is one way of recording the type of relationship you had with him, and you'll undoubtedly write about many of your memories together. Read Writing Through Grief, one woman's account of writing letters to her sister after her death.

If you have any other tips on different ways you can write about your stories and memories, please e-mail me and I'd be happy to include them on the site.

Remembering a Loved One

Collecting Stories from Others

Preserving Your Own Memories

Gathering Memorabilia and Treasures

Creating an Online Memorial

Paying Tribute during Special Occasions

Books about Remembering

Preservation/Care

Things to Keep in Mind

 
record the memories of a
female friend or relative
 

"We do not know the true value of our moments until they have undergone the test of memory."

~ Georges Duhamel